But then in March, my daughter, Laura, introduced me to The Bloggess. I was hooked! I love Jenny Lawson! And when her book, Let's Pretend The Never Happened, came out, I had to have it. I read it out loud to Roland. He even chuckled now and then. Even when I couldn't read because I was laughing so hard. (Note: there are some serious and sad parts, too... not everyone's life is funny ALL the time).
Jenny and me at the Barnes & Noble, Atlanta |
The reason I'm tellling you about the Bloggess, is that hands down, she wins the game. She explains why in the 2nd chapter where she lays out "the 11 things most people have never experienced...". Of course, she grew up in rural west Texas, and I grew up in urban, Dallas, Texas, so I did have non-poisonous running tap water. And, while I do know what a cistern is, we didn't have one.
But I'm reading out loud to Roland on our way to a folk art auction in Buford, Georgia and I get to #5. Quoting directly from the book: "Most People don't have live raccoons in the house." Well, I'm here to tell you that my dad's mom, my grandmother, Curtis, had a pet raccoon named Ringo. It was in the 60s, so I'm not sure if he's named after that famous Beatle, Ringo Starr, or just because he had rings around his tail. Honestly, my bet is on the rings around the tail.
A few of the differences (I won't give away all the funny parts of her story):
- Jenny's family had multiple raccoons living in the house that she, herself lived in. Curtis (I'll tell you the story of her name in another post) just had the one. And I didn't live with Curtis, but we all lived in Dallas, and got together frequently for family, um, get-togethers. Anyway, we saw them a lot.
- Jenny's mom sewed tiny clothes for them (jams, specifically). The jury is out on whether or not Ringo wore clothes, but given how Curtis loved to dress her little chihuahua, Quincy, in outfits many years later, there is a definite possibility that Ringo didn't go around naked every day.
- Jenny's family culled the crowd down to just one by letting some of them go, but it appears that raccoon ran around the house a lot, until he got banished outside to a chicken cage. Ringo lived in my grandmother's spacious pink bathroom, and ultimately in a screened-in porch that legend (my memory) has it was built just for him. Complete with small pool and tree. Do raccoons like trees?
Buddy was the family collie that was apparently a playmate for Ringo. Or was it the other way around. Not pictured: the 15 or 20 cats that were also family pets.